"Come. Sit." Mac instructed, once Danny was gone. He stepped behind his desk.
Abby crossed the office and set down in the waiting chair. She slipped her bag over her shoulder and placed it on the floor beside her other bag. She smiled at him. Mac set down behind his desk, pulled out a file folder, and smiled back at her.
"You look like I remember," he told her, settling into his big leather chair.
"You, too."
"Horatio's already called. He worries about you, Miss Walker," Mac told her.
"I know." She nodded. "Abby. Please."
"Abby then." Mac turned back to the file.
"Um, Sir?" Abby ventured, leaning forward in the chair.
"Mac."
Abby hesitated. "Mac?"
"Yes?" he asked, not looking up from the file.
"Did Danny know I was coming here?"
Mac looked up then. He folded his hands out before him over the file on his desk. "No."
Abby set back. "Oh."
"You seem disappointed."
"Not really."
Mac smiled, warmly. "But you wish he'd known?"
Abby shrugged. "He seems... Different... Somehow."
"He is different, Abby."
"How so?" Abby asked, her interest piqued. She was a psychologist first and foremost, that was just what Abby Walker was.
Mac set back in his chair. He eyed her for a moment. "He'll have to tell ya that, if he wants ya to know."
Abby nodded, deciding to drop the subject of Danny Messer for the time being.
"Would you like a tour?" Mac asked, suddenly, closing the folder.
"That sounds like fun," Abby answered, sweetly.
The two of them stood, Abby grabbing her stuff, while Mac closed the folder, but held onto it, and headed toward the door. Mac stepped aside and let Abby infront of him, like a Southern gentleman would do, but she had to remind herself that she wasn't in the South anymore. She knew she was going to like this place. Mac was such a nice man, and Horatio trusted her enough to work under him. Now she just hoped she could trust herself enough to do the job to the best of her ability and make Mac Taylor just as proud as she had Horatio Caine.


Mac Taylor took Abby on a nice tour of the NYPD, Crime Lab.
She liked the way things looked: the new mixed with the old. He showed her everything from the AFIS machine to the TRACE lab. He was very thorough and he explained everything to her like she didn't already know what everything was. He showed her the new Homeland Security gadgets that hadn't made it past New York City, but when she questioned why not, he wasn't quite sure himself. He relished in the questions she asked him, even when she already knew the answer and only did it to humor him. He showed her the newest technologies that Miami-Dade could only dream of having someday and some of it really did amaze her. She had no idea about some of the high tech gadgets she would get to play with in New York City. She would have to email Calleigh and let her in on all the cool stuff she had seen on her first day. She wouldn't believe the names of them, let alone all the cool things they did. This wasn't your average Crime Lab and Abby was noticing that more and more by the second.
"This is Danny's office," Mac announced as he stepped through a door that led to a small room with two desks facing one another and one on the other side of the room, each holding a computer, but not much else. "That was Detective Bonasera's desk over there, but she's not in this room anymore."
Abby surveyed the room. It was nice--not as nice as the office she had had when she was at Miami-Dade, and not as nice as Mac's office had appeared to be, but nice. It was small, but held some personal items: a couple pictures on Danny's desk and some ballerina stuff on the other one. She turned to him with a smile, folding her arms over her chest. There was definitely a girl in this office, too. Mac smiled back, coyly.
"Who's in here with him?" Abby asked.
"Oh. That would be Lindsay. Lindsay Monroe. She joined the team a little over a year ago."
Abby nodded. "She's his partner?"
Mac nodded.
"What happened to Aiden?" Abby asked, slowly.
Mac's soft blue eyes glossed over for a moment. He stared at Abby as if he had just seen a ghost. Had Danny not told her about Aiden? Why had he not mentioned it to her? He thought the two of them were friends. Maybe they weren't friends after all. Maybe he had been wrong about the two of them. Mac wasn't wrong about much in the world, but then again, Danny was a hard guy to understand at times. Maybe he had miss read him somehow when they were in Florida.
"Danny didn't tell ya?" Mac asked, pushing his hands against his hips, moving his jacket back a little bit to reveal his badge.
Abby shook her head. "Nothing about Aiden."
"She's dead, Abby."
Abby's eyes widened, but she said nothing.
"She was killed a year ago," Mac continued.
"Danny never told me, Sir. I'm sorry."
"We miss her. She..." Mac's voice became shakey. "She was a CSI til the end."
Abby smiled. "That's a good thing."
"Yeah. She was a good person. You would have liked her."
"I'm sure. Danny talked a little 'bout her, ya know? But then one day he just stopped mentioning her. I figured she quit. I never asked any questions," Abby answered.
Mac nodded. "He was really close to Aiden. He likes to hide things from the world. But you know that."
Abby stared at the man before her, dressed in a black suit with a tie, his blue eyes taking her in. He knew something he wasn't telling her. She wanted to ask him what he was thinking, but decided not to, because it was her first day on the job and she couldn't be suspicious on the first day of work with her new boss.
"Shall we?"
Abby nodded without another word spoken between the two of them.
Mac turned and started walking back in the direction of his office; Abby followed close behind. When they reach his office, Mac stopped infront of his desk and turned to Abby, a serious look over his face. Abby stayed close to the door, she was afraid to move. He was so serious--totally different from Horatio. But not in a bad way.
"See this here?" Mac held up the file that was still in his hand.
Abby nodded.
"This is the file that Horatio sent to me. I have everything on you here, Abby." He opened the file and scanned through it. "I have your school records here, test scores, Acadamy records, Quantico, background check," he explained. "Hell, I got ya bank account information here and your Social Security number just to name a few personal things that ya might not want out to the general public."
"I understand."
Mac looked up from the file and smiled slowly at the young woman before him. "I don't wanna make a mistake, Abby. I was told a million times over by everyone above me not to hire Danny Messer because he was a loose cannon. Now, I understand you have some skeletons in your own closet."
"I do. I told you about Brady Hooper."
"Yes, you did. And Horatio filled me in on some things when we spoke. But I just want your word, that I am not making a mistake. I want you to promise me that I won't have the Captain on my ass if I hire you," Mac told her seriously.
Abby scratched her eye brow. "I promise you, Detective Taylor, you're not making a mistake in hiring me. I am very good at what I do. You said so yourself. I love my work. When I focus on a case, I give my all. The victims come first, in my opinion. I don't think there's any other way of viewing what we do than to say that the victim comes first."
Mac nodded. "Very good answer, Abby. That's what I wanted to hear."
Abby breathed a sigh of relief.
"Welcome to the NYPD Crime Lab," Mac reach his hand out.
Abby shook it with a smile.
"Any questions?"
"Where will my office be?" Abby asked, unsurely.
Mac closed the file and lay it down on his desk. "Come with me."
They walked through the lab once more, stopping outside the door that led to Danny's office. Abby stared at Mac, questionably. He smiled back at her, a knowing look over his soft face. She bit her bottom lip for a moment, afraid to ask any questions, because she feared she already knew the answers.
"Are you serious?"
Mac nodded. "Yes."
"You want me and Danny to share an office?" Abby demanded.
Mac nodded again.
"But I had my own office at Miami-Dade."
"I understand that, Abby. I'm sorry. You will use Detective Bonasera's old desk," Mac pointed to the empty desk in the corner. "She just got an up-grade."
Abby cut her dark eyes over to the small desk, which set off to it's own in the darkened corner of the office.
"Besides, you know Danny," Mac continued. "It'll be good for you to be in the same room with someone you already know and trust. That way, you won't have such a hard time adjusting to your new enviroment."
"Does Danny know?" Abby asked after a moment.
Mac shook his head.
Abby stifled a laugh under her breath. "You keep throwing me into his world, Sir."
Mac shrugged. "It's good for him. Trust me. He'll thank me later."
"You think?"
"I know."
Abby nodded slowly. She wasn't going to argue with him. If Mac Taylor said it was a good idea, well then, it must have been a good idea.

POOR DANNY...

awww...poor lil Danny!
he's all a taken aback by Abby arriving at the crime lab.

...Plan B might be the solution since she realized, as she stepped closer, that Danny Messer was standing in Detective Taylor's office with him. She started to turn and run away like a cowardly 12 year old, but it was too late--Mac saw her. He smiled warmly at her as he motioned for her to come join them. Danny wasn't paying attention, he still had his back to her--pouring over a report, when she entered the office.
"Miss Walker? Did you have a nice flight?" Mac asked.
Before Abby could answer, Danny turned to her. His beautiful blue eyes widened in confusion as he took her in. He couldn't believe his eyes. Abby Walker was standing behind him. She was just as beautiful as she had been two years before: same chocolate brown hair (just a little shorter), same intense brown eyes, same smile, and same innocent face. She looked like a tourist with her sunglasses high on her head, an i-pod, and a bag slung across her chest. She was still just as breath-taking as he remembered. He almost forgot to breath.
"Abby..." he whispered, barely speaking beneath his breath.
Abby smiled at him, slow and sweet, like a Southern woman would do in a situation like this. She wanted to run to him. She wanted to hug him. But she gripped her shoulder strap, instead. They held each other's eyes for a long moment. Both of them remembering what it had been like the last time they had been together. It had been wonderful that day on the beach, just the two of them. Alone. In a perfect world. Together.
"I'm sorry I couldn't come and pick you up myself. Hectic day," Mac chuckled, oblivious of the two CSI's as they stared intently at one another. "But I see you found the Crime Lab just fine."
Abby broke the stare. She turned to Mac. "It's ok. I understand."
"Good."
Abby smiled at the older man. "There was a really nice old man who helped me."
Mac and Danny looked at each other. Was that too random? Abby wondered as she watched them exchange odd glances at one another. She shifted uncomfortably in her spot. She needed her stress ball, but it was in her black-hole of a bag which she lost everything in, it seemed.
"Danny, aren't ya goin' say hi to the pretty lady?" Mac asked, suddenly.
"How ya doin', Walker?" Danny asked, making the question sound more like one word.
Abby bit her bottom lip. "Hey there, Messer."
The three of them were quiet for a moment. Abby hated awkward silences, because she never knew what to do to fill the void, she just didn't know what to say. And neither man seemed to know what to say, either. Damn it! She really needed that stress ball.
Danny cleared his throat. "If that's all, Mac. I--"
"Sure, Danny. Get back to work," Mac answered.
Danny nodded, turned, and headed toward the door. He brushed up against Abby as he stepped by her. She wondered if he did it intentionally or not. She wanted to grab him and pull him to her, but she resisted the urge. Instead, she let the moment pass and let him go on about his business. She would get her chance to talk to him later.

i love that, Mac says: "danny, aren't ya gonna say hi to the pretty lady?"
danny's all like: "how ya doin', Walker?"
then, in response, Abby says: "hey there, Messer."
oh, yeah, they're in love...

CH 1

Abby Walker stepped off the plane into JFK airport, New York.
The airport was buzzing with excitement. People were going this way and that. She didn't know which way to go herself, but she needed to get her luggage, which consisted of a Louis Vighton suitcase. She headed toward baggage claim and stood for half an hour, watching others get their bags, and fearing in the back of her mind, that maybe her stuff had been lost. Finally, her luggage came around on the conveyer belt and she grabbed it before it disappeared. She headed toward the front of the airport. She thought Monday mornings in Miami were murder--she hadn't seen nothing yet!
Abby stepped out into the crisp breeze of New York. It was colder than she had expected, her jacket, which she often complained about being too warm in Florida, not protecting her from the elements as much as she would have liked. If she had been in Miami, it would have been well near 70 degrees at that very moment. She scolded herself for thinking about Miami: thinking about the beaches--the board-walks--the sun--the surf--the sand between her toes. She was in New York now. This was her home. There was no turning back.
Her lips already felt chapped. She ignored the cold wind that was blowing through her dark hair, which she had pulled up into a clip high on the back of her head. She felt her ears begin to burn from the cold also, but decided it was best to ignore that, too. She would have to get used to the weather. She knew this before she ever moved. The wind chill was like zero degrees outside, but it wasn't what was bothering at the moment. What was bothering Abby Walker was the fact that she did not know how to hail a taxi cab.
Abby stepped over to the edge of the side walk, one bag over her shoulder and the other one at her side. She stared out into the bustling city and wondered what to do next. She saw others stick their arms up high and a yellow car would stop for them. She saw some whistle, and others just walk right out into the street. Her instincts kicked into over-drive and she wanted to tell them to be careful, but she thought better of it when she remembered where she was. This was not Florida. Things were different here. People were different here.
Abby was thinking this when someone bumped into her. At first, she feared it may be a mugger, so she clutched her bag close to her chest. It was an older man with grey thinning hair sticking out from under a golfer's hat. He looked at her quizzically for a moment, then mumbled something under his breath in Italian. Abby stared at him for a moment, unsure whether she should speak or not.
"What're ya doin'?" he asked, his accent thick, but not threatening.
Abby glanced around, not quite sure if he was speaking to her or not. "Me?"
He moved his hands irratically. "Anyone else standin' here?"
"I guess not."
He mumbled something else under his breath in Italian. Abby didn't know the language, but she had heard it enough to pick out from Spanish. She was more accustomed to it, being that she had lived most of her life in Florida.
"What're ya doin'?" he asked, his wrinkled face softening for the first time since he'd approached her.
"Are you going to cuss at me, Sir?" Abby ventured. "I'm sorry for being in your way." She had heard that New Yorker's could be very rude when they wanted to be. She hoped apologizing to him would deter him from saying anything mean to her.
The old man smiled. "I work over 'ere at a deli," he pointed down the street, in the southern direction, as he spoke.
Abby turned to look. She didn't see a deli. She nodded anyway. Humor him like you would any other old man, she supposed was the best thing to do.
"I know you're a tourist."
Abby smiled, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "I just got here."
He nodded. "I don't like to see pretty girls wandering the streets alone. Too much crime. I have a daughter of my own. I know that New Yorker's have a reputation of being rude, but I'll help ya out."
Abby couldn't believe her luck. She blushed, feeling the happiness descend on her. She wouldn't be standing out in the middle of the street looking like a dumb-ass, after all.
"Thank you," she told him.
He put his hand up as if to say there was no need in thanking him. Abby took the hint and said nothing more.
"Where you headed?" he asked, heading up the street.
Abby took the hint and followed. "The New York City Police Department--Crime Lab."
He stopped, turning around. "You in trouble?"
"No." Abby smiled at the old man because he looked genuinely concerned in his eyes. "No. I'm their new Criminal Profiler."
"What's that?" he asked.
"I get inside the minds of serial killers," Abby answered bluntly.
He weighed that explanation for a moment. Then he continued walking. "You need a cab. Ever hailed one before?"
Abby shook her head, still trailing along behind him.
He glanced over his shoulder; he looked shocked. "Where you from?"
"Florida. Miami, actually."
"Never been there. Too much sun."
Abby chuckled at the sarcasm coming from this old man. He looked like your typical grandpa, but he spoke with a thick New York accent. She thought about Danny then. She shook her head, trying to block out any thoughts of him. She did not want him to distract her when she was learnng how to hail a taxi cab in New York City.
The man stepped over to the edge of the busy street. Abby stood back a couple feet, afraid to get too close to the street edge. There was a lot of traffic around her--more than she was used to. The old man reach his arm up high and gave his hand a quick wave. A yellow cab pulled up to the curb, almost instantly. He turned to Abby with a huge grin that reminded her of a child who had just done something right. She hurried over to him and he opened the back door for her.
"Enjoy your new job," the old man told her as she climbed inside the open door.
He started to push the door shut, but Abby stopped him. "Sir? What's your name?"
He tilted his head to the side. "They call me Lazlow. I own Antonella's Deli. Come in and have a sandwich sometime."
Abby smiled up at him. "I will. Thank you."
Lazlow shut the door. Abby watched him as he pulled his coat tight around his small body, tipping his hat downward over his eyes, to keep the wind out. He headed up the street, toward the city lights; he was lost a midst the crowd before she knew it.
"Where to?" asked the cabby, cutting into her thoughts.
Abby took out the slip of paper she had jotted the address down on and handed it over the seat to the driver. He read it, handed it back to her, turned on the meter, and pulled back out onto the busy street without another word. Abby reach in her bag, pulled out an address book--tattered and worn from years of abuse--and wrote the name of the deli in the back. She would definitely be paying Lazlow a visit. He had been so kind to her, when he didn't have to be. She pushed the book back into her bag, settled into the seat, and took out her i-pod. She needed to relax before she got to the NYPD Crime Lab.


* * *
Abby looked up when the cab stopped.
She pulled her i-pod ear phones out and set up. She stared at the cab driver, a confused look over her face. "Excuse me? Are we there?"
The cab driver looked up in the rear-view mirror at the young woman in his back seat. His eyes were the color of midnight, his brows were black and bushy, and his face was brown. Abby felt nervous, suddenly. She couldn't help but think about 9/11. She had never been to Ground Zero, but she had cried just the same when the towers had fallen. Her instincts screamed for her to be cautious. Without realizing she was doing it, she reach for her bag. She might need her gun.
"Sir?" Abby asked, slowly.
The man stared at her for a moment more. He pointed to the meter. "Twenty-seven, thirty-five," he said, his voice thick with a foreign accent.
Abby moved her hand from her bag. She got her change purse out, instead, and rummaged through it. She pulled out the amount the man asked for (plus a tip), handed it over the seat, and thanked him for giving her a ride to the NYPD Crime Lab. The driver took the money, graciously, a smile coming over his face for the first time since Abby had stepped foot into the cab.
Abby opened the door, feeling the cool wind as it blew against her face. It was prickly, and definitely not as fresh as the wind that blew in Miami, but it was still nice. She smiled to herself as she climbed out of the cab. She pulled her bag out with her, shut the door, and turned to head up the sidewalk. The NYPD Crime Lab was only feet from her now. It was real--finally!
Abby slung her bag across her chest as she walked up the sidewalk. In a matter of minutes, she would be there. She would be inside the building that was going to be her new home. She would meet the people she was going to be working with. She would see Danny Messer again. Things were going to change, but for the better, she knew it. Abby had to believe this as she pushed her hands deep into her jacket pockets, because if she didn't, she might listen to that inner voice that was screaming: Jump back in that damn cab and drive away!!!
Abby climbed the steps that led up to the NYPD Crime Lab. She moved aside to let a couple uniforms by, then proceeded up to the door. She reach out and pulled the door open. This was it, no turning back. She stepped into the building, hearing the buzz of faint conversation. She made her way down a long corridor, wondering which way was the right way to go. There was no one there that she recognized and she wondered if she would even see Danny what with the number of workers that seemed to be there.
A young guy in a lab coat came out of a side door. He was dressed in a lab coat, so Abby took the chance to assume that he probably knew Detective Mac Taylor. He looked busy, reading a report, but Abby decided to stop him and ask him if he could point her in the right direction.
"Excuse me?" Abby started.
The lab tech looked up from his report. He stared at Abby for a moment, then a slow grin spread over his face. "Can I help you?"
"Can you tell me where I could find Detective Mac Taylor?" Abby asked, slowly.
The young man turned and pointed down the hall. "At the end of this corridor, you'll come to an open lobby. Detective Taylor's office is up a set of stairs, straight ahead, can't miss it."
"Thank you," Abby smiled at him.
"No problem."
Abby continued down the corridor, excitement spreading throughout her body the closer she got to the end. Sure enough, with in seconds, she was greeted by an open lobby. It wasn't anything fancy, but it was definitely cozy. She glanced up, and there it was, Detective Mac Taylor's office! Abby almost fainted right then and there. She took a deep breath to keep herself from swaying forward. This was going to be ok. She just had to keep telling herself that. But if all else failed, she always call Horatio. She did have him on speed-dial.
Plan B might be the solution since she realized, as she stepped closer, that Danny Messer was standing in Detective Taylor's office with him. She started to turn and run away like a cowardly 12 year old, but it was too late--Mac saw her. He smiled warmly at her as he motioned for her to come join them. Danny wasn't paying attention, he still had his back to her--pouring over a report, when she entered the office.
"Miss Walker? Did you have a nice flight?" Mac asked.
Before Abby could answer, Danny turned to her. His beautiful blue eyes widened in confusion as he took her in. He couldn't believe his eyes. Abby Walker was standing behind him. She was just as beautiful as she had been two years before: same chocolate brown hair (just a little shorter), same intense brown eyes, same smile, and same innocent face. She looked like a tourist with her sunglasses high on her head, an i-pod, and a bag slung across her chest. She was still just as breath-taking as he remembered. He almost forgot to breath.
"Abby..." he whispered, barely speaking beneath his breath.
Abby smiled at him, slow and sweet, like a Southern woman would do in a situation like this. She wanted to run to him. She wanted to hug him. But she gripped her shoulder strap, instead. They held each other's eyes for a long moment. Both of them remembering what it had been like the last time they had been together. It had been wonderful that day on the beach, just the two of them. Alone. In a perfect world. Together.
"I'm sorry I couldn't come and pick you up myself. Hectic day," Mac chuckled, oblivious of the two CSI's as they stared intently at one another. "But I see you found the Crime Lab just fine."
Abby broke the stare. She turned to Mac. "It's ok. I understand."
"Good."
Abby smiled at the older man. "There was a really nice old man who helped me."
Mac and Danny looked at each other. Was that too random? Abby wondered as she watched them exchange odd glances at one another. She shifted uncomfortably in her spot. She needed her stress ball, but it was in her black-hole of a bag which she lost everything in, it seemed.
"Danny, aren't ya goin' say hi to the pretty lady?" Mac asked, suddenly.
"How ya doin', Walker?" Danny asked, making the question sound more like one word.
Abby bit her bottom lip. "Hey there, Messer."
The three of them were quiet for a moment. Abby hated awkward silences, because she never knew what to do to fill the void, she just didn't know what to say. And neither man seemed to know what to say, either. Damn it! She really needed that stress ball.
Danny cleared his throat. "If that's all, Mac. I--"
"Sure, Danny. Get back to work," Mac answered.
Danny nodded, turned, and headed toward the door. He brushed up against Abby as he stepped by her. She wondered if he did it intentionally or not. She wanted to grab him and pull him to her, but she resisted the urge. Instead, she let the moment pass and let him go on about his business. She would get her chance to talk to him later.
"Come. Sit." Mac instructed, once Danny was gone. He stepped behind his desk.
Abby crossed the office and set down in the waiting chair. She slipped her bag over her shoulder and placed it on the floor beside her other bag. She smiled at him. Mac set down behind his desk, pulled out a file folder, and smiled back at her.
"You look like I remember," he told her, settling into his big leather chair.
"You, too."
"Horatio's already called. He worries about you, Miss Walker," Mac told her.
"I know." She nodded. "Abby. Please."
"Abby then." Mac turned back to the file.
"Um, Sir?" Abby ventured, leaning forward in the chair.
"Mac."
Abby hesitated. "Mac?"
"Yes?" he asked, not looking up from the file.
"Did Danny know I was coming here?"
Mac looked up then. He folded his hands out before him over the file on his desk. "No."
Abby set back. "Oh."
"You seem disappointed."
"Not really."
Mac smiled, warmly. "But you wish he'd known?"
Abby shrugged. "He seems... Different... Somehow."
"He is different, Abby."
"How so?" Abby asked, her interest piqued. She was a psychologist first and foremost, that was just what Abby Walker was.
Mac set back in his chair. He eyed her for a moment. "He'll have to tell ya that, if he wants ya to know."
Abby nodded, deciding to drop the subject of Danny Messer for the time being.
"Would you like a tour?" Mac asked, suddenly, closing the folder.
"That sounds like fun," Abby answered, sweetly.
The two of them stood, Abby grabbing her stuff, while Mac closed the folder, but held onto it, and headed toward the door. Mac stepped aside and let Abby infront of him, like a Southern gentleman would do, but she had to remind herself that she wasn't in the South anymore. She knew she was going to like this place. Mac was such a nice man, and Horatio trusted her enough to work under him. Now she just hoped she could trust herself enough to do the job to the best of her ability and make Mac Taylor just as proud as she had Horatio Caine.

CSI:NY story # 2

I CAN'T DECIDE

by: Mandy


THE SCISSOR SISTERS
--I Can't Decide--

vs. 1
It's not easy having yourself a good time
Greasing up those bets and betters
Watching out they don't four letter
Fuck and kiss you both at the same time
Smells like something I've forgotten
Curled up, died and now it's rotten

vs. 2
I'm not a gangster tonight
Don't want to be a bad guy
I'm just a loney baby
And now you've gotten in my way

chorus:
I can't decide
Whether you should live or die
Oh, you'll probably go to heaven
Please don't hang your head and cry
No wonder why
My heart feels dead inside
It's cold and hard and petrified
Lock the doors and close the blinds
We're going for a ride

vs. 3
It's a bitch convincing people to like you
If I stop call me a quitter
If lies were cats, you'd be a litter
Pleasing everyone isn't like you
Dancing jigs until I'm crippled
Slug ten drinks I won't get pickled

vs. 4
I've got to hand it to you
You've played by all the rules
It takes the truth to fool me
And now you've made me angry

chorus:
I can't decide
Whether you should live or die
Oh, you'll probably go to heaven
Please don't hang your head and cry
No wonder why
My heart feels dead inside
It's cold and hard and petrified
Lock the doors and close the blinds
We're going for a ride

bridge:
Oh I could throw you in the lake
Feed you poison birthday cake
I won't deny I'm going to miss you when you're gone
Oh I could bury you alive
But you might come back with a knife
And kill me when I'm sleeping
That's why

chorus:
I can't decide
Whether you should live or die
Oh, you'll probably go to heaven
Please don't hang your head and cry
No wonder why
My heart feels dead inside
It's cold and hard and petrified
Lock the doors and close the blinds
We're going for a ride

she's 43 & thinks Carmine is HOTT

i have a friend on Myspace named Suzanne. we originally became friends cos she has 2 chihuahuas & is a fan of "Dexter" like i am. but she had been browsing thru my photo albums on Myspace or whatever & looked in my I <3 Carmine Giovinazzo album. i'd posted the pic of Carmine on the bed with the cigarette in his hand, ya know the one if ya call yourself a devoted Carmine fan...and i'd written down below it that i thought the photo was very sexy of Carmine, yum! she posted back that she thougth it was (and i quote) "hot! hot! hot!" yes, a 43 yr old married woman with kids said this about Carmine. man, his hotness surpasses generation gaps, huh??? :)

Name Changes

ok. first of all, i decided to tweak a few things in my CSI:NY stories.

the characters that i created, their names for one.

*i changed Abby's name from ABBY DONOVAN to ABBY WALKER, i just like the last name WALKER better is all. plus, Detective Walker flows better, i think.
*i changed Cadence's name from CADENCE HOOPER to BRADY HOOPER. idk, i just liked Brady better than Cadence. to me, Cadence started to sound like a girl's name.

in the first story, it was all about the case, no? (i tried) i did have a few holes, i noticed as i read over the final copy, but i don't have any kinda program to edit my stories on, so yeah...

well, in later stories, especially the one that i plan to do a la "Trapped" style when Abby & Danny probe a shooting at Antanella's Deli, they get trapped in (yes, Danny, another panic room, damn!) with a lil girl cos she is scared & decides to push the "panic button" like she's always been told to do if anything should ever happen...

there will be more one-on-one action b/t the characters, since Abby's arrival, cos i wanna do character stuff more than the cases. not to say that the cases won't play a major role in the stories, cos it is CSI:NY, after all, but i wanna get to the heart of the story-line b/t Abby/Danny/Lindsay/Flack, ya know.

i know some of ya'll are wishin' for the smuttiness that i have not gotten to yet, but the smut will be in the later ones, promise! :) i just wanna make ya'll wait for it, cos i'm mean like that. no, i just wanna play up the dynamic b/t Danny & Abby first. i wanna show ya'll that there's more to their relationship than just sex!!!

i will be posting my 2nd story soon. :) i will try not to be so slow about posting "I CAN'T DECIDE" like i was with "BOULEVARD OF BROKEN DREAMS" k?

--Mandy--

Laguera's Post

this is the title of her post from Feb. 25, 2008:

The 14th Precinct - Oh, CSI:NY, You're So Cute in Your Wanking Britches, Trying So Hard to Be a Big Boy

(so the stalker chick must've been rumored a few weeks before i got wind of it, guess i'm just not hip-to-the-trip, lol) really, i just don't keep up with the whole fandom scene cos i'm not a member of it... ~without further ado~

CSI:NY fen is in a lather over its recent appearances on fandom_secret. Apparently, the DL crazy has reached toxic levels, and an unnamed fen denizen has been accused/outed as stalking Carmine Giovinozzo, going so far as to lurk outside his home for several hours.

Setting aside the seriousness of that type of crazy, I do wonder what the stalkette would have said if he had come out?

"I come in peace."

"Got a pool table, and if you do, can I consecrate it with my own stain? I'm not contagious, I swear."

"You're shorter than I thought." (that is just mean!)

And why do the NY fangirls obsess so rabidly over Carmine? He might be a talented actor, but he's always struck me as a trifle pompous and certainly infinitely less approachable than his male co-stars, Eddie and Hill, who are, IMHO, vastly more articulate and gracious than him. To be blunt, reading Carmine's interviews is akin to watching a chimpanzee masturbate at the zoo.

Have some DLers so conflated the actor with the role that they can't separate the real Carmine from the fictional Danny Messer? Are they enthralled by the idea of the bad-boy, emotionally unavailable fixer-uppers? Or do they just have a latent furry fetish that manifests itself in an inexplicable lust for bipedal weasels who look like bathing is optional on most days?

Maybe Carmine uses Axe body spray. How dirty boys get clean. Sort of. (this is just mean, too!)

On a more serious note, I feel for Carmine and hope that this incident, if true, is isolated... Previous line redacted in the ridiculous, overblown need for fandom security, and God, I hate doing this because it's such chickenshittery, and for fuck's sake, it's fandom, a lazy fucking fandom, at that, not the NSA, and if I'm supposed to be the MIB, I want my fucking Raybans... In any case, I sincerely hope he's checked his attic and crawlspace for any furtively lurking cable installers with psychotic identity crises.

I am amused by the gravitas exhibited by most CSI:NY fen when they're confronted with this wanklet. They refer to it in hushed, somber tones, as though it were a Category 5 perfect storm. I can only laugh, because as a veteran of the Wanketnam known as Potterfen, I know it's just a burp that wouldn't satisfy the gaping maw of Fandom Wank for more than three minutes. Not after Laptopgate, Lexicongate, and the disgusting 4Christina.org firestorm that consumed Fandom Wank for days. A rabid CSI:NY fenner with a stalking jones for Carmine is mere garnish on a flaming wank flambe.


uh...did she just call Carmine a bum??? gotta love girls that don't get us "rabid fangirls", huh? it must be a sad lonely existence not being a fan of Carmine Giovinazzo. ya gotta be a fan of Carmine to understand us! ;p

i disagree with her line about how he seems pompous & less approachable than Eddie & Hill & her opinion about how Carmine is less articulate & gracious than they are....ookkaayy...sure, he has his philosophies about life (who doesn't) & does seem a bit more liberal than the others...but'cha gotta remember, he's also a very creative person by nature & sometimes people don't understand people who think with their creative side...i know this from personal experience cos as ya know, i'm a writer...and sometimes people just don't get me.
i don't know about you, but i feel that Carmine is very gracious & he appreciates his fans/their support. i've heard good things about how he's answered emails & such.
true, there are girls out there that can't distinguish b/t Danny Messer the character & Carmine Giovinazzo the man behind the character, but there are those of us that find a nice balance, ya know? like Carmine's said himself, the two of 'em are kinda similiar, but not completely...anyone with half a brain would realize that Carmine might be incorporating some of his "Staten Island Roots" into his role, but one must also remember that Danny Messer is a fictional character!!!
i've been a fan for quite some time & i've never gotten the impression that Carmine's pompous or unapproachable, he seems very down-to-earth to me.
whatever...i like dirty boyz... ;o

--mandy--

YEAH, JUST SO YA KNOW..........

i am planning to post my 2nd CSI:NY fic soon. it is entitled, "I CAN'T DECIDE". this is the fic that brings Abby to NYC and she & Danny have tonz of angsty fun. ;o

i am sorry i've been slow about posting the 2nd fic. and i apologize for neglecting my beloved blog here, but i've been hella buzy these past few months & do tend to get distracted quite easily when it comes to the internet.

so, yeah.

this is why i've been force feeding this blog like a baby over the weekend. i've been trying to update as much as possible so ya'll can have the info ya crave about Carmine Giovinazzo.

--Mandy--

WEB PAGES THAT MAKE THE WORLD GO 'ROUND

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=19nutnxbc_s ((NEW YAWK STATA MIND))

yeah, this is really cute. all of those Danny-isms. i really like the last one: "wanna get a slice? i'm hungry. where am i?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wjIPUg65ayo ((CARMINE ON EXTRA))

this is a really interesting interview. ya learn a lot about the kinda girl Carmine is really looking for. he wants a girl that's "different" well, i've been told i'm quite different ;p

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ch96nBZ2pYk ((DANNY & ANGELL VID))

i like this video! it was the first nu-DnA video i came across way back when i first started watching CSI:NY & decided i was anti-D/L. totally gave me warm fuzzies! (but honestly, i'll always have a soft spot for the original DnA: Danny/Aiden) ~gosh, i miss her soooo much!!!~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Cen1fJP80A&mode=related&search= ((DANNY MESSER, SOMEWHERE I BELONG))

probably the best Danny Messer video out there. the song totally reflects what Danny's been thru in his life.

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http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1004069/ ((KIMMYCHU's D/F FICS))

she has some really great/hott fics here. i've read some of her stuff. so if ya wanna have some hot guy-on-guy sex, check this page out.
"jackhammer loves his kinkapoodle"

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUP5Z4VOTLc&NR=1 ((HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO AXN))

this is totally cute. :) *Carmine snorts* that is all ya need to know!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://stolen-glances.com/gallery/index.php ((A SCREENCAP SITE FULL OF D/L PIX & SOME OF CG & AB WITH OTHERS))

this is a really good screencap site. if ya like DL, much the better. but if ya just wanna get some really cute danny moments, check it out, too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://csiny.pastmyshoulder.com/ ((A REALLY COOL CSI:NY SCREENCAP SITE))

this site is loaded with tonz of cool csi:ny screencaps from s1-present. the screencaps consist of the entire members of the team, enjoy!

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http://talk.csifiles.com/ ((WHERE YOU CAN TALK ANYTHING/EVERYTHING CSI/CSI:MIAMI/CSI:NY))

yeah, these girls can be real brutal on this site, but ya might learn something new here. i usually on check it out to get updates on the show/find out what's going on with the relationships thru the perspectives of the fangirls/read interviews.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://csiny-sl.livejournal.com/ ((KIMMYCHU's LIVEJOURNAL, D/F))

this is all things D/F slashed! you can find out about what is going on on a more personal level with the fangirls here, too. she is very thorough with her postings & i like that. plus, she has really cool tid bits & such concerning the DF relationship.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://www.ceesau.com ((THE OFFICIAL WEB PAGE OF CARMINE'S BAND CEESAU))

this is the site where you can check out ceesau & all things related to it. you can purchase a copy of the cd or check out the cool rags they offer & purchase yourself a shirt to sport around town in support of ceesau.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://carmine-fan.com/gallery/index.php ((CARMINE GIOVINAZZO FAN GALLERY))

super cool site, ya'll. you can find tonz of pix of Carmine whether it be interviews, photo shoots, candid, csi:ny screencaps, photos from other movies/tv shows he's been in/misc. yeah, i like this site very much, cos i can find some really cool pix of my handsome lil boy, Carmine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://www.bella-dorka.com/carmine/ ((CARMINE's CREW))

this is a site run by a girl named, well, dorka. she pretty much has a bunch of info concerning anything/everything related to Carmine Giovinazzo. you can find pix of him here, connected to the fan gallery, too, btw. you can get interviews/info concerning any kinda updates that Carmine is involved in whether it be his music career, his acting career, or other.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://youtube.com/watch?v=czxxv-7XkT8&feature=user ((the pool table scene b/t Danny & Flack))

this is a really cute scene b/t our two favorite NYC Detectives. i love this episode for several reasons: 1. Mac just walks out of the court room. 2. Danny is a cocky son-of-a-bitch! 3. the bar/pool table scene b/t Danny & Flack. i've often wondered, "what is Danny jotting down on the napkin before Flack joins him?"

KINKAPOODLE GOTTA BOO-BOO!!! (the eternal question)

"What next? Flack! Paper cut! Kiss the booboo?"
((lorelai asked this on talkcsi))



"He'd (Danny) probably be sitting at Flack's desk after hours or something and he'd be the naughty boy he is and go rifling around in Flack's drawers peeking at what bad, bad toys Flack's keeping in them. And then, he'd cut one of his fingers while skimming through some gay romance novel and go hunting down Flack and then demand that Flack kiss it to make it feel better."
((kimmychu's response))


i could sooooo see Danny doin' this! :)
how cute would that be???

but the whole bit about Danny rifling thru Flack's drawers while he was away from his desk...yep, Messer would totally do that if he got bored.

i can just see him sitting there, getting all anxious cos no one's there to talk to him & all the pretty shiny things are out of sight. (must find shiny things...) thus, leading Danny to rifle thru Flack's drawers.

~good times!~

Top 20 Reasons why Danny and Flack Belong Together:

20. Danny was the first one who touched Flack (Rain)
19. Danny was the first one who called Flack Don (OTJ)
18. “Does Flack know?"
17. “You better don’t go missing pal.”
16. Danny calling Don "Crime stopper"
15. The nicknames-- "Dan" and "Danno"
14. Flack is Danny's knight in shining armor--and Danny sure is one damsel that's always in distress.
13. "Nice suit." "Nice shoes."
12. "We're not going anywhere."
11. Because Danny made sure Don won't forget they have a date on Saturday. ( Hoops on Saturday, Flack. Don't forget.
10. The staring!
9. Who does Danny call in the finale? Thaaat's right. Flack
8. Who does Danny talk to about the court case in ep 23? Thaaaaaaat's right. Flack
7. Who does Danny call in "OTJ"? Oh yeah, thaaaat's right. Flack
6. THE STARING!!!
5. "Ya like that?" "Yeaaah."
4. They look hot just playing pool
3. THE STARING!!!!
2. He looked back toward Don in "Snow Day", didn't he? YES....Iiiiinteresting
And.....the number one reason:

1. Oh, did I mention the staring???

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
ok, i'm not a 100% D/F shipper, by any means, cos i'm not that obsessed with guy-on-guy action, altho Carmine & Eddie are too sexy boys and if there was to be some guy-on-guy action, i'd love to see those two go at it ;p however, i can see the appeal of the relationship that the slash girls out in fandom have for it. let's face it, D/L pretty much sux, except for the one time they did have sex in s3 (but they had to get drunk b4 that even happened!) so...i'll admit it, i sometimes even find myself daydreaming about Flack whisking Danny off into the sunset *who loves his kinkapoodle? jackhammer loves his kinkapoodle!*, leaving Lindsay outside the crime lab, mouth wide open, wondering what the heck just happened???


((the above list is courtesy of the talkcsi girls at talkcsi.com))

THE SECRET'S OUT!!! (posts that started it all)

SECRET #1

you think we are best friends.
you tell me you're going to marry this man one day and i squee for you.
we even made a private LJ group to talk DL and bash the roaches and that bitch Angell.
but secretly, I HATE YOU.
i'm so jealous you went to his house and sat outside for THREE hours. i'm so jealous your in NY waiting for him and Anna to be there filming episodes.
i hope you never see him. you're so UGLY. he'll never fall in love with you. he's not your future husband.
HE'S MINE.



SECRET #2
i thought we were friends. we used to message each other and chat about him all the time.
then you went to LA and took photos of his house and showed them on your journal. you wouldn't give me his address though you promised you would.
i was so nice to you. i was your friend and you lied to me. i know you left the board to avoid me.
~first secret: i told you love DL but i could care less about it. i have been talking with the "roaches" behind your back.
~second secret: i promised you i would never tell the things you've done like send Zuiker letters begging for a job.
oops. sorry. NOT.


SECRET #3
you told people how good i am at writing smut. when you made the lj post about the flames you got for your DL story i showed you support and told you to ignore them.
the truth?
i agreed with the flames.
YOUR DL SMUT SUCKS.
MINE IS FAR BETTER THAN YOURS.
i only wish i had the guts to tell you but i'm scared you will make the others hate me.


apparently this is the interview that started the whole thing! http://www.csifiles.com/interviews/carmine_giovinazzo3.shtml

(the DLer that the poster is referring to supposedly wrote some stuff in her Myspace about how she was gonna marry him ~seriously, no joke here~ then, read his anti-D/L comments in above interview & got pissed off at Carmine & erased all of the post about him)

Here's what KIMMY thinks may happen in the next few episodes, should the DL-centric spoilers come to pass:

Rikki making an appearance will certainly have something to do with Danny. Carmine had mentioned in a recent magazine interview (is it also CSI Magazine?) that 'he doesn't know whether there'll be a relationship between Danny and Rikki. Doesn't mean the possibility is eliminated, but it could still be there.

(ya know, i don't think this relationship necessarily has to be a romantic relationship, but i kinda like the possiblity of there being one. i have praised the red-hot chemistry b/t Carmine & Jacqueline before, but seriously, people, it rox!)

My guess is that Lindsay finds out Danny has been spending time with Rikki. It makes sense; they live on the same floor, they're just doors apart, they're both grieving over Ruben's passing and Danny's already rescued her once from committing a terrible crime that'll ruin her life. And it's clear in episode 4x11 that they've known each other for quite some time. A good mother wouldn't let her child play with some stranger, ya know?

(this scenerio totally makes sense. think about it, Danny & Rikki are already friends, like Kimmy said, they have to know each pretty well for her to have let her kid be out with Danny like that & her not initially freak out over them not returning on time... and this is so Lindsay... thinking that the world revolves around her, always!)

Considering what Belknap had said about not knowing whether the DL ship is even there or not, I'm sticking to my initial idea that Lindsay's feelings for Danny are one-sided. I know, you're probably saying, "Hey! Didn't he ask her out for dinner and then attempt to ask her out for lunch again and fly to Montana to attend her trial?!"

(how does one not know if she is in a relationship with another person on a tv show? i mean, it's called acting for a reason...the actors should have cues, don't cha think in order to know if they are "still together" or not, a lil direction would be freakin' nice here! i've always been under the impression that Danny liked Lindsay more than Lindsay liked him, cos of his reactions to certain situations in comparison to her reactions, but idk, this makes sense to me... if ya think about it, Lindsay always had control over these situations)

Yes, he did all that but, from Belknap's own mouth, Lindsay was the one who chased Danny first, not the other way around. It was only after she showed evident interest that he asked her out for a dinner. A dinner which she never went to and left him sitting at the table alone like an idiot, and didn't even bother to explain herself the next day after he trailed after her like a kicked dog, except with the very lame excuse of, "It's not you, it's me."

(why did Danny have to follow her around like that anyhow? this scene has always bugged me. this is the scene i tend to reference when i am telling someone the reasons behind my dislike of D/L. this is a pivetol scene in and of it's self. really, all. its like the writers expected Danny to behave this way. Danny! the boy cries, sure, over his loved ones and close friends, but i don't buy that he'd actually behave this way over a girl...even Lindsay...he's not known her all that long, really. they've not bonded the way he's bonded with Stella & Aiden. to me, Danny seems like the kinda guy who would be like: "fuck it. you don't wanna eat with me, i ain't gonna follow ya around like some castrayted mutt in heat.")

It's possible whatever interest he had in her was already waning by then. Sure, he flew to Montana to attend the trial but if you watch that scene, you'll see it's always Lindsay who makes a move, not him. In fact, when she leans in for a kiss, he doesn't react at all and just stands there. (And I have it on good word that a certain talented actor was not happy about his popular character flying to Montana to begin with, and it makes me happy to know he actually cares when his character's acting out of, well, character.)

(this is an aspect of the D/L relationship that has always baffled me. seriously, why would Danny fly out to Montana? for moral support? possibly. but still, he could've just called her, ya know? he could've called her & made sure she was ok. he didn't have to fly out to Montana & check on her. that was just border-line clingy...and Danny Messer don't cling, damn it!!! i don't blame Carmine for being offended by his character behaving OOC. ~i wasn't happy either, Boy~ yeah, the whole thing is quite unbelievable to tell ya the truth. i find it impossible to concieve that Danny Messer, the hottie who has "girlfriend for that" would actually break his own code of "not falling in love" and fly out to Montana to be there for Lindsay... uh-uh, never should've happened!!!)

Hell, it has always been Lindsay who made a move, even in the season three finale.

(what angered me the most about the whole sex scene b/t Danny & Lindsay in the s3 finale was this: it's like they had to get drunk in order for it to happen. am i the only one who noticed this??? i can't be!!! i do have to give Lindsay some props, however, in this scene cos she did show some of her assertiveness that was blatantly obvious when she was a kick-ass chick back in Zoo York, but sadly has not been since...)

By the way, that was, ironically enough, the episode that convinced me Lindsay's feelings are one-sided. C'mon, how can you not laugh at Danny's answer to Lindsay's remark of thinking he'd left: "This is my apartment. Where am I gonna go?" He might as well have said, "This is my place. If anyone's leavin' it should be you."

(yeah, that was odd that Danny would say that. she was all worried he'd leave her, like she knew he wasn't a commitment sorta guy, yet, she needed reassurance that he wasn't gonna leave her...and boy did he let her have it, huh?)

Lindsay displayed her clingyness right then and there. They have sex just once and already she has attachment issues. Think of the last scene she appears in the same episode, when poor Danny with his broken hand and ribs is crawling out of that trailer and Flack and Lindsay approach him at the same time. Did she have any reason at all to drag Danny away like that (from Flack, no less!), what with him being so injured? No, she didn't. But she still felt the need to do that anyway even if meant causing more pain to the guy she supposed has feelings for. She showed a very selfish side of herself, even more so when she tried to subtly get some sweet comment or something out of Danny even though he was hurt and in pain. Serious WTF there.

(i'm glad i'm not the only one annoyed by this scene. i watched it a while back & realized that Carmine kinda hesitated before he asked: "sorry for what?" i have often times wondered if this was something the director told Carmine to do to elude to him thinking: "don't be sorry..." almost out of shock or something...or if it was a conscious move on Carmine's part to convey what Danny should've really been thinking: "damn it, Girl, you should be sorry! if it wasn't for you, i wouldn't have been here in the first place! it's totally yo fault i almost died today!" i vote for the latter, actually)

So now, a few months after the season three finale, after Danny rebuffs her multiple times and acts like she doesn't really exist, I doubt Lindsay's going to react well to Danny spending time with another woman. Especially if she thinks Danny's 'hers' in some way just because they had sex once.

(seriously! Danny acts as if Lindsay ain't there most of the time, don't he? the scene b/t Danny & Lindsay reguarding the spray-on-condom is almost comical, not cos it's supposed to be a joke, but cos Carmine's expression is like: "seriously? do i i have to act like Danny's gonna use this with Lindsay? WTF?" yeah, the whole scene is pretty funny what with the expressions that Carmine has over his face the entire time & is all like: "what? how?" -very confused boy, sexy- but i'd just about bet, Carmine is cringing thinking that the fangirls are squee-ing over the inuendo possibilities. in "child's play" when Lindsay comes in to --what?-- comfort him, Danny just throws his hands up & walks away. then, there's the infamous scene in the test lab when Danny solves the case & just walks out without a single remark to either Lindsay or Kendall... ~priceless, btw~)
T
he possible 'DL moment' in episode 17? Considering how Danny's treated her this whole season, particularly in episode 4x11, I highly doubt it'll be some mutual lovey dovey moment. It totally doesn't make sense. The only way I can see it happening is that she attempts to come on to him while they're collecting/processing evidence, hence Quinn saying Lindsay left her evidence unattended. Personally, I think it's stupid of Lindsay to even do something like that at work in front of other people but, well ... desperate times call for desperate measures, eh, Lindsay?

(yeah, if Lindsay stoops to desperate measures like that, then i'll lose all respect for the character. i've tried to be reasonable & just assume that the writers suck ass when it comes to trying to accomidate Lindsay's character & finally find her nitch, but its been 3 yrs, for cryin' out loud! don't cha think it's about time the girl finds her groove? i mean, there's only so much whining & so much bitchiness that the fans can stomach before we start saying: "look, Anna's cool & all, but maybe she's not cut out to be on CSI:NY after all." tone her down a bit when it comes to the issues & stop trying to make the whole Danny/Lindsay thing happen, it's not gonna happen...they had sex...so what? does that really mean they're "in love"? No!)
D
id I mention Mac only goes to talk to Lindsay about her irresponsibility due to this 'moment', and not Danny?

(interesting... it's almost like Mac's saying: "hey, Danny knows better..." face it, there's only so much love Mac can have for one of his crew before he starts disciplining 'em. if all else fails, maybe he'll put Lindsay on probation for a while & the whole D/L fiasco can have some breathing room...)

Well, whatever it is, it's gonna be lol-worthy. There are only so many scrunch face expressions to do. Heh, we'll see what happens, eh?

(agreed! if the D/L relationship is it on or not debate isn't resolved soon, i dunno what'll take place out there in fandom. i don't personally feel that Danny & Lindsay are still in a sexual relationship, tho. i feel that it was a one time deal, atleast on Danny's part, cos he sure ain't showin' love toward her these days)

~Comin' Back, Sweetheart~

1. Rikki Sandoval is making an appearance in episode 4x16! :D Ya know, Rikki, the sweet, bereaved mother of ten-year-old Ruben who was shot and died from his injury in episode 4x13. The one Danny called sweetheart?

(yay! i love the chemistry b/t Danny & Rikki. Carmine & Jacqueline Piñol "Rikki" totally rocked their scenes in "Child's Play" & "All in the Family" s4)

2. Danny and Flack will have a scene together in episode 4x15!

(while i'm not a hard-core D/F shipper like some of the fangirls, i do enjoy their interactions & sometimes wish Flack would just grab Danny up in a hot-man-kiss & make him forget all about issue ridden Lindsay! all i can say is: BRING ON THE FLESSER MOMENTS!!!)

3. There will be a possible 'Danny/Lindsay moment' in episode 4x17, but this is uncertain as of writing this because the way the spoiler was revealed is ... rather unfavorable, particularly on Mac's character. I'll explain more on this possible 'DL moment' below.

(yeah, from what i've gathered is that someone is gonna blow the whistle so to speak on the relationship b/t Danny & Lindsay not being just friends anymore & that the person is gonna spill the beans on inner-office relations going on while on the clock...whatever!)

4. Mac's step-son, Reed, makes an appearance in episode 4x17 as well!

(yay! i love Reid. he's pretty cool. the actor who plays him has done some pretty diverse roles, too. but i like the relationship b/t Reid & Mac. they have this dynamic about them...here's this kid who doesn't know his real mom, Clare, yet he's got this step-dad he never even knew existed! and they share this bond over a woman that the kid never met & the man knew better than anyone)

***ALL INFORMATION REGUARDING WHO'S GONNA BE GUEST-STARRING ON CSI:NY CAME FROM KIMMYCHU'S LIVEJOURNAL***

--mandy--

ANNA BELKNAP BLAMES THE WRITERS FOR THE WAY LINDSAY'S BEEN PORTRAYED, BUT DID SHE ACTUALLY TALK TO THE WRITERS ABOUT HER CHARACTER???

certainly want to read this interview for myself (Kimmy). In a way, this has justified our suspicions (D/F shippers) all this time that Danny and Lindsay aren't in a relationship, even now after everything that's happened.

There's also this: Belknap has said 'even she was confused why Lindsay turned Danny down because Lindsay was the one who chased Danny in the first place'. (A certain very cool person had her thoughts vindicated for this. Girl, feel free to rub it in their faces as much as you like!) When I (Kimmy) first heard about this, the first thing that came to mind was it really seemed as if she was blaming the writers for Lindsay being such a terrible character.

Is she right? I dunno (Kimmy). I'm (Kimmy) definitely on the ball on that one. I (Kimmy) think the main reason that awful, awful rejection scene in season three happened is because the writers were desperate to drag any hint of D/L as looooong as possible so Danny will continue to be a prop for Lindsay's character as long as possible. (Danny being a prop for Lindsay's character came straight from Carmine's mouth in his last interview with CSI Files.) So in that sense, looking at the situation from afar, I (Kimmy) put more of the blame on Belknap being a bad actress. The writers have proven themselves time and again of being more than capable of writing good scripts and plots for the show.

And guys? Since it's official that Carmine, Peter Lenkov and A.J. Buckley have visited TalkCSI ... I (Kimmy) wouldn't be surprised at all if Belknap has as well. She may even know about the infamous Why Lindsay Must Go thread, hence my suspicion of her suddenly saying she has no idea why Lindsay acted the way she did in season three. Come ON. If Carmine is willing to talk to the writers when he feels something isn't right for his character, any other actor on the cast can do it too! And if she knew something wasn't right for Lindsay's character, why didn't she say anything about it to the writers?!

EDIT: Thank you again to 1perfectanomaly for more details!

... she went to the writers and asked them why Lindsay was standing Danny up when she obviously was interested. AB says the answer she got was, "Oh, you know, it's drama. We've got to make it bumpy."

Heh, so she did go to the writers. I'm (Kimmy) still on the ball about Belknap though. Even if the writers did tell her that, she should be capable of building her character and make an effort to do it after all these years since she's, ya know, an actress.

Seems to me as if she's attempting to put the blame on the writers for Lindsay's character being so lousy. Hmmm. The interview itself should prove quite interesting.

Gee. I (Kimmy) wonder if a certain group of people are going to start hating Belknap now for saying something that goes against what they believe of their TWU WUB SHIP OF PINK FOGGY HAPEENESS,. Or, ya know, start hurling accusations that CSI Magazine forced Belknap to say those things and mind controlled her and ohhh, I dunno, hypnotized her in saying such evil, horrible things!!!

ARE DANNY & LINDSAY STILL IN A RELATIONSHIP???

((INFO CAME FROM KIMMYCHU'S LIVE JOURNAL))

So in a recent CSI magazine, I (Kimmy) think, there's an interview of Anna Belknap. (Please to be correcting me if I'm wrong.) Hahah, I know, she has nothing to do with Danny/Flack but here's the amusing thing ... Belknap herself says in the interview that even she has no idea whether Danny and Lindsay are actually together or not! *ROFL* Seriously! So much for D/L shippers claiming they've been together since season two or what not.

According to Belknap, she and Carmine had 'discussed about this to figure out whether Danny and Lindsay are together'. Didn't say anything about making a final decision so ya know what? I'm (Kimmy) thinking they're not interested in their characters being in a relationship. 'Cause really, what the heck is there to discuss?! The only reason I (Kimmy) can think of why such a thing is dragged out for so long is if one or both of them aren't keen on it happening. Too bad the networks believe only in predictable, contrived and narrow-minded drivel they think will make them money.

And hey! EVEN THE SEASON THREE FINALE IN WHICH DANNY AND LINDSAY HAD SEX WASN'T ENOUGH TO CONVINCE EITHER BELKNAP OR CARMINE WHETHER THEIR CHARACTERS ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP OR NOT! So guess what that means? Even the two actors don't think they're in love either!

Carmine Stalker say WHAT???

yeah, so i read on KimmyChu's LJ that there is an alledged "carmine stalker" circulating around the internet.

the culperate is thought to be sugah66 cos she is a hard-core D/L shipper, but her friends have come to her defense & said it wasn't her that went all the way to LA & stood out infront of Carmine's house for several hrs, waiting to get a glimpse of handsome.

no, some people in fandom are accusing a D/F shipper to be behind the leaking of "secrets" supposedly shared b/t her & sugah66 on an anonymous secret site...who knew such a place existed, huh??? they are saying that the D/F girls are just wanting to stir up trouble in the fandoms.

but the D/F girls swear they didn't know anything about it til they got an anonymous tip that something was going on in the D/L fandom, concerning a possible CG/AB/EC stalker...yeah, all 3 stars are apparently being targeted by this person!

they seemed just as shocked as the next girl to learn that someone was losing grip with reality & actually moved to NYC to be close by in case the show came there to film on location.

the D/F girls say that the situation shouldn't become a shipper-war. i totally agree. this girl's delusions of marrying Carmine Giovinazzo someday have nothing to do with who someone ships on the show. (i ship DnA, what'cha think about that, Bitches?!)

i dunno. the whole thing got started, i reckon, cos this girl read an interview on talkcsifiles, conducted by Kristine Huntley back in July of 07. supposedly in this interview Carmine comments that "Danny is nothing but a crutch for Lindsay" at this point (which i totally agree with!)

anyhow, the girl had posted on a Myspace Account that she was gonna marry Carmine someday (seriously, she wasn't jokin' like the rest of us) then, upon reading the interview he gave to KH, which most thought he was cohursed into saying such awful things about Lindsay & the D/L relationship, she erased her post and got really pissed off about him making negative comments about D/L.

seriously, this is when the world of fandom becomes a dark and dangerous place! it's brutal enough out there, cos not everyone agrees with ya on who should be fuckin' who, without some delusional girl lurking about causing problems.

sugah66 ain't spoken about her ties to the "stalker" incident stated in the secrets posts, to my knowledge. i'd like to know what the girl thinks about her name being linked to such a crazy thing!

the show is ficitonal.
the characters are fictional.
there is no danny messer.
there is no lindsay monroe.
there is no don flack.
carmine, anna, & eddie are actors.
they just play a part on a tv show.
people need to remember, this is all for entertaiment.

i just hope Carmine is safe. i don't want anyone hurting him. he's a talented actor, sure. he's hott!!! (no doubt) but he's a person, first. he deserves his privacy, if he so chooses. stop standing outside his house, snapping pix like an obsessive crack-head whore with nothin' better to do...Seriously!

(my advice? girl needs to get laid, ASAP!!!)

--Mandy--

~IT'S OFFICIAL~

ceesau's cd has dropped!!!

official web page: www.ceesau.com

Congratz to Carmine & the boyz for being "Top Seller" @ CDBaby!

"So, Carmine, what's up with ceesau?"

CSI Files: So today is the release of your band Ceesau's CD, "Era of the Exposed"!

Giovinazzo: The website, www.ceesau.com is live now, but the album is officially released [today]. The website's very cool and kind of explains a bit of what people have been asking about, what Ceesau is about and where that came from. Like I said, it's something I started over 10, 15 years ago, about racial unity and equality, about a drawing that I had done. My roommate in college, Keith, kind of took part in that. We had made shirts and hats initially and had really wanted to do that, but then it kind of sat on the sidelines for a while. I just kind of always used that title for things that I'd done. I've always been writing music and kind of messing around. I consider myself a real average fucking guitar player. I just write songs and I've played with a bunch of different people over the years. I play with this drummer who's in my band now, Mike Brasic and playing with John [Amedori], who's the lead guitar player. I just want[ed] to put something together more than just acoustic, more than just myself. I've always wanted to bring a couple of people together make something happen.

John is unbelievable on guitars as far as I'm concerned. He's a little busy right now. We did lose it for the whole hiatus last year and just played and played and played and got to a point where I was like, "Let's record." We wrote 10, 12 songs and then were like, "Let's pick three." And then we were going to do six and decided we were getting closer to an album. We decided to just do five. We basically recorded it in a day and a half and it was really kind of raw. Before I knew it, this is what I got. Mike, the drummer, has really been into it and getting everything moving, like the website and the MySpace" and all that. It's something that to me is sometimes overwhelming and too much because it is complicated when you want to do the recording and really get it together and make a finished product--what goes into it when that's not [the only thing] you're doing. If I was just doing music right now, that would be a different story, but to uphold this job and keep that going and keep these guys [in the band] together and everybody happy and excited. It's tough, so this is what we got. It's not bad. People that have listened to it have thought it was alright. I'm just more excited about making something from nothing. That is totally amazing to me to do that.

There's a possible show coming up that would be sent live via the internet. I'd love to tell you more about it, but I don't know right now if it's definitely 100%. It would be a live show and a couple of bands and I think everyone's going to play one song. And [people] can see it live through the web. So that's kind of exciting and right now we're just going to try to have people check the record out and see what happens.

CSI Files: How would you describe your sound?

Giovinazzo: I like Iggy Pop, Henry Rollins, The Pixies, Nirvana--I like a lot of [music]. I grew up on rap and so many other different kinds of music. There's so much good music out there. It's really whimsical in a way, especially with the first one. It is what it is because of Mikey playing drums. I feel like most of these songs were passed down in one way, shape or form and what John took on to it, and what we [brought to it]. [The album] has a decent range of styles--some of it's sad, some of it's kind of rocking. It's all kind of about something. It's always interesting writing lyrics. When you're only doing five songs, you kind of get crazy about it, and it's just five songs. I like it to be about anything. This is mostly about universal kind of things and what everybody writes about, looking at the world and how you see it and think you need to do with yourself and as well as what you think might be a better thing for everybody else. It's angry, it's kind of uplifting.

This one song, "Wrote the Longest Word," is about how everything is everything, everybody is everybody, everybody's the same in a sense, in a philosophical, ideological [way]. The sense of if we could all start back from zero and just be like, what makes us segregate and separate and get all screwed up. Just all these little bubbles that we come from and these things we're taught and we think are right, the way people should be or shouldn't be or what we should believe in. That's my voice in that sense and my remedial guitar playing with everyone else's kickass lead guitar and drums. I'm happy about it. Queens of the Stone Age or people like David Bowie or Tom Waits--some people just write music and they're so talented with every aspect of it, like Jimi Hendrix or [Eric] Clapton or Zepplin--they're just so ridiculously on another planet. But for me it's just kind of like certain art. I don't really love abstract art completely, but I don't discount art that's somewhere in between abstract and insane realism. You look at art like that, and it's like, "Well, fuck, I'm not going to pick up a brush again." It's just music that's about the right thing. I'm not doing it to put on black nail polish and dye my hair and become a rock star. I would love to be playing around and, if I could, keep the band together. Right now it's just more like another outlet.

CSI Files: Do any of the five songs have a special significance for you?

Giovinazzo: Yeah, they all do. Like I said, "The Longest Word" is about wishing that things were a little bit better, wishing we could rewind from the chaos and the ultra, ultra technologically modern world that we've become, fast-paced, and we're all running too fast. I'm trying to pull back from being so affected by all of those things. It's something I feel--it's more about how I feel and I see things. Then there's a song about my perspective, me looking through other people's perspectives having gone through something--that's "She Will Get Over This." It's all kind of whimsical in a sense, that song [had] different kind of lyrics when I first wrote it. And then it ended up becoming this little story I wrote about from the point-of-view of somebody losing someone. This [other] one is about insomnia and losing sleep and wanting to be happy and accepting that things are good and not worrying so much. That would be song four ["Tear to Spare"]. So I'd like for people to listen to it, see what they say.

CSI Files: Are you going to play live anywhere?

Giovinazzo: That's just based on how I work out getting the right guys together. John's just kind of really jumping and running as an actor right now and has a lot of shit going on. That's a difficult situation, so I kind have to find somebody who can make me as content as I was with him. How to do it so that Mike would have time to fill his seat and then myself having the strength and energy and the time to make it happen and then to put it together. Those are things that kind of hold the balance of whether we do that or not.

CSI Files: What is the significance of the album's title, "Era of the Exposed"?

Giovinazzo: It kind of means what it says. It's probably been this way for a while, but everything is just being exposed now, whether it's corrupt people or whether it's the media or people's lives or how things work or how things tick, who did this wrong or did that wrong--everything's being unraveled. It's the era of being exposed. It's kind of sickening and also over-do. So that's what that's referencing. It's a little heavy. I'm trying not to be too heavy about [all this]. There's so many things you could say or title a book or say in one line, and you have to kind of come up with five words. That was something that happened and does reflect our time.

CSI Files: Does that have a personal significance since you're now something of a public figure?

Giovinazzo: Yeah, maybe, maybe unconsciously that is. I think that is something that is an odd thing that I've always kind of dealt with and never really let phase me at all. It definitely hasn't done anything to who I am and in a sense, but that in a sense it has to do something to you because if it's happening to you, it's happening to you. It's not something I enjoy too often. The music I almost don't mind because it is a straight personal thing and it is something I created. With the acting sometimes, you get involved in it, people want to know about you, as much as I get it and I think it's cool to a certain extent, but at the same time I kind of despise it. It's like a great episode of Iconoclast, this great show on IFC where they take two fascinating people, whether it be Mikhail Baryshnikov and the woman who revolutionized organic food in San Francisco or Paul Newman and Robert Redford. I think Newman said something interesting like, "What the fuck are these kids doing now? We know if they're having a sip of Jack Daniels. We know what they're wearing to the spa." It's like, what the hell happened? It's the truth. Russell Crowe is one of those guys that's really [against] that. As an actor, you want to play a character and that's how you want people to see you. Johnny Depp keeps it under wraps and so did [Robert] DeNiro back in the day, and Daniel Day-Lewis. You want to keep that, but in this day and age, it's all about publicity and that's who gets the job and those are the people that people want to hire and that's who you're talking about.

So it's a screwed up time in that sense. Nobody's going to get discovered. People walk by the Newmar and casting directors and producers, and they won't even know it's in their face. I could be wrong, but it seems like it's not the time anymore where you can just discover a great artist and a great musician and a great actor or a great anything because it's all just so abundant. But I think we're kind of moving [forward]. Look at right now, we have a black guy and a woman running for president, cool movies are being made like La Vie En Rose, movies about important things. I think we're going through that shift we have to go through, going back towards doing things that are more for everybody and about the right reasons and not about just making money. The people in power have that way of thinking, but they're the ones that are controlling the situation. It's hard to be a bum or an unemployed actor or a low-budget writer getting this stuff out there, because you have to have a movie star in it. Or you need this or that to get it out there. But I think [getting away from that is] the change that's happening.

CSI Files: Is there anything you personally hate being asked or questioned about, that you feel is too personal?

Giovinazzo: I don't think I do that many [interviews], I haven't been bombarded enough to be at that point. Nothing important. I've done a lot of this crap that has to do with being single and I kind of, to be honest, hate that I've done that. I've answered questions, "What's your ideal date?" I never answer them right because I'm nervous and not really wanting to be there and I'll say something really stupid. Things like that you just can't answer in an interview and that I don't think are really important.

This Ceesau thing it's about all that I'm talking about. I would like to make it big enough so that I can do something with it. And it says it on the site and I will do this, certain charities that I've been involved in and have dealt with, I'll use this money if I make any [for them]. I'm doing this completely independently--I don't have a record label, I produced it myself, I put up my money, I put up my time, I designed the shirts, I talked to the people that make the shirts, I've found a place where I'm going to print the shirts. I'm just trying to get it up and running, so any money that I make is going to go to a charity in Staten Island and different things here and there. I don't want to be another actor jumping on the charity fucking bandwagon like everybody's doing, but you know, but it's definitely something I'd like to be able to do and I am doing in my own little way right now so hopefully people can catch on to Ceesau being about an idea that's positive that happens to have an actor underneath it, music underneath it, shirts underneath it.

CSI Files: What charities do you support?

Giovinazzo: There's one that's for abandoned children in Staten Island. I've done things for autism and the Dodgers--they've done some great building of parks and stuff. I have a friend of mine that I met through the Dodgers that I need to be involved in a little deeper. I'm a little handicapped right now because it's just me and I'm just trying to uphold this job right now and do what I'm doing to be involved. I do a lot of stuff for other people, like Gary Sinise (Mac Taylor) raising money to keep his theater company going, just showing up and being a part of it. Just giving money here and there. I'd love to be involved in anything of that nature that could help a kid without a father or without a mother and that kind of situation that these little things make a difference. The one on the website is called the New York Foundling. It has a connection to September 11th.

CSI Files: What would you like to be the future of your music?

Giovinazzo: I don't know. It's hard with CSI: NY to see my future with anything else until it's done. I could see myself playing around and traveling the United States and playing music with the band. I think that's something that could be cool. Sometimes I think I'm not really worthy of doing that because I'm a little hard on myself about my capabilities. It's more of a passion, but I have worked hard at it. I would like to have it out there for a lot of people to hear and to be appreciated and to be heard.

CSI Files: What's your ultimate career goal?

Giovinazzo: As far as this business is, I want to get back to making films. I'm going to try to do that as best I can while I'm doing the show although it's a little complicated because of the time constraint. I'm hoping that's going to start happening again. I've done a little independent or two, but I'm hoping this hiatus, as much as I'd probably like to just put my feet up or play some music, I'm hoping I can find a really cool role to play and do that. I'm really kind of itching to play something different. That's always been my main goal, and hopefully I can do that as I do this show. And hopefully when I'm done with this show, just do that. TV is a tough grind. It would be nice to work on something really intensely and really something full throttle and start it and then end it and then just take a breather and try to do these other things I want to do. [See] if I can coach a baseball team for that matter. Just get a sort of balance in the whole picture.

CSI Files: Do you have a dream role?

Giovinazzo: I'd love to play the character of Johnny Boy from the movie Mean Street! I just think he's fucking classic. I always liked that movie--it's like [Martin] Scorsese's second movie. It's just low budget and DeNiro's just so fucking young and kind of funny and crazy and a cool character.

CSI Files: Is there any actor's career that you most admire or aspire to?

Giovinazzo: I love everything that Viggo Mortensen has done. He's just had a career. Before Lord of the Rings, he had these interesting flicks, and I think he's a musician also. He writes and he's got soul kind of, and he's got this cool artistic world happening around him. And now he's got the Lord of the Rings which is fucking great for him, and he's probably just to the point where he can kick back more, which is just ideal. Though it took him a while to get there and he had to hustle for a long time.

CSI Files: How do you see your future with CSI: NY? Are you in until the end?

Giovinazzo: Right now I'm in it. I'm curious to see how far we'll go. It's such an amazing job to have and I've definitely grown to appreciate that more and more and it's something that has changed my life immensely in many ways. I think I'll go as long as everything is going the way it's been going. It's good people to work with. Unless a tornado came through or I couldn't do it anymore for any reason, I'm going to continue to do it.

Kristine Huntley interview with Carmine Giovinazzo

INTRODUCTION:

The 2007-2008 television season has been an exciting one for Carmine Giovinazzo. His CSI: New York character, Danny Messer, found himself in an untenable position when his ten-year-old neighbor, Ruben Sandoval, was shot and killed while in Danny's care. Danny has been grappling with enormous guilt from the incident. Giovinazzo's own life is much more sunny: today sees the release of his band Ceesau's first album, "Era of the Exposed" and the launch of their website, www.ceesau.com, which goes into the band's philosophy behind their music. Giovinazzo discussed Danny's rough year and his own music with CSI Files' Kristine Huntley on the eve of the album's release.

Carmine says, "Danny's the fuck up" (the interview)

CSI Files: You guys are back at work now. How's it been going?

Carmine Giovinazzo: This is the second week back and it's all good. We're doing two episodes simultaneously, and so far, so good.

CSI Files: Is it confusing to shoot two episodes at once?

Giovinazzo: Yeah, it's a little confusing. You just take another beat, remember [which episode you're working on] figure out what's going on. Overall it's been pretty good.

CSI Files: How do the stories look so far?

Giovinazzo: I think the stories are pretty good. They've followed up with this Second Life storyline [from "Down the Rabbit Hole"] and then I've had some transition already, some crazy scenes with Lindsay and some things happening in that department and then new things happening already as far as other relationships right off the bat. Which is cool right off the bat.

CSI Files: Can you give us a little teaser of what's coming up for Danny?

Giovinazzo: He turns to somebody in a very intimate way to help him to try to deal with what he's dealing with right now with the kid. Something fun and kind of different will happen with that.

CSI Files: Are we possibly looking at a love triangle with Danny, Lindsay (Anna Belknap) and Rikki (Jacqueline Pinol)?

Giovinazzo: I don't know what's going to happen, to tell you the truth! I don't know, but things are happening and people are talking and there are scenes that are exposing some feelings, so that's good.

CSI Files: Are Danny and Lindsay still together?

Giovinazzo: That's what we're wondering, that's what we're trying to see. I don't know at this point.

CSI Files: The romance with Lindsay has taken a back seat to Danny's other major storyline this season. How do you feel about that?

Giovinazzo: I think it's just a matter of them figuring out how to put it in the front seat. When they figured out how to do it, they were going to do it, but it's fine. It's nice to touch upon it and keep it flowing but I guess letting everybody keep it in their imagination. I think that's just about priority and other things they were working on. But it's fine with me. I don't want them to force anything.

CSI Files: Danny has had a huge storyline this season with the death of his neighbor, Ruben, in "Child's Play". When did you first hear about it, and how did you feel about learning about it?

Giovinazzo: I don't think I heard about that until it came up. When I read it, I thought it was fantastic. That episode kind of came out of nowhere and all the sudden I had to be in this intense situation. That was cool. It's great--that is something that is going to stay with me. He feels responsible for this kid's death. That's partially what you'll see in this [upcoming] episode, that's kind of a result of that, and also with Lindsay is a result of that. ["Child's Play"] was a great episode to do. 415 or 416 both touch upon it in different ways. I'm kind of mixed up, I don't know if the Lindsay and I scenes are 15 and the other ones are 16 or if they're [in] the same [episode], so either way there's going to be things that that incident has caused to happen that are happening now in these episodes.

CSI Files: What happens between Danny and Lindsay?

Giovinazzo: She's opening up a little more now. There are just a couple of scenes where she's discussing what she's feeling and then talking about what I've gone through and how that's affected her and how she feels. Anna has this monologue that's going to be really revealing about what she's thinking and what she's feeling. Finally some sort of discussion and things coming out about us and what you might not have had a chance to see.

CSI Files: Do you know what's coming up next for Danny and Lindsay?

Giovinazzo: No idea. They're either going to have a child or just completely end it I think. They're going to get really serious or it's going to be over.

CSI Files: Do you have a preference?

Giovinazzo: No, I don't because I'm really kind of split with it. I don't know how it would go because we really haven't gone there. It really just depends on how they want to do it.

CSI Files: Danny feels he's absolutely to blame for Ruben's death. Flack says he isn't. The fans are split on it. What about you? Do you feel Danny is responsible for Ruben's death?

Giovinazzo: Yeah, definitely. I think whether he is or not technically, any person in that situation would feel responsible and I think he does feel like that was his fault. He's going to feel guilty about that probably forever. That's something he's going to be stuck with, and that's the end of that.

CSI Files: At the end of "All in the Family", Danny seems at a loss for how to stop blaming himself for Ruben's death. How do you think Danny will finally be able to move beyond it?

Giovinazzo: I'm assuming season five, midway to the end, Danny gets checked into an insane asylum or does therapy and has to take a sabbatical. I don't know how much they're going to deal with it or if they're just going to play underneath as its going along. I don't know if there's ever going to be closure on it. But what happened already brings it up and talks about it and gives a little insight to where he is and how he feels about it.

CSI Files: So you see Danny in an insane asylum in season five?

Giovinazzo: It would be kind of wild if he just gets to a point where he is obsessed about it or confused about it and needs to work it out. Obviously not to that extent because he is a cop and there's things they're involved in--certain environments and situations, and he's around cadavers and dead people all the time so there's obvious some kind of mental stability and strength [that he has to have for the job]. I just think it would be interesting to have him work on it or work it out somehow. I don't know how much they would actually want to get into that, maybe [not] the insane asylum but maybe [Danny] losing it a little bit or just trying to work through it in some way. I don't know if that's through another character or some sort of relationship or some sort of situation for him to discuss it and get it out and [stop] feeling guilty and that it was his fault.

CSI Files: We've heard Ruben's mother is coming back in an upcoming episode. What's going on with her and Danny?

Giovinazzo: That's what we're figuring out. That's kind of the surprise in episode 16 that you're all going to have. That's going to introduce her again and the part that she's playing in this situation. I don't want to say exactly what's going to happen there but she is going to come back.

CSI Files: Can you tell us for sure it's not romance, or can you not say?

Giovinazzo: You're not sure what it is, if it is or it isn't. That's kind of what it's about. Is it about him trying to get over Ruben and her get over Ruben or a kind of beginning of who knows what.

CSI Files: In "All in the Family," Flack (Eddie Cahill) was there to back Danny up. And this was the first time we've really seen Flack and Danny at odds. How did you feel about that?

Giovinazzo: Is it the first time? I don't think it was the first time. I think when I was kind of losing it when I shot the cop [in "On the Job"], he was kind of other end of things. He's kind of that opposing voice somewhat even though he's on my team and tries to calm me down. I think that just reflects the characters more than it reflects our relationship. They had him doing the right thing as far as being a detective is concerned and not feeling how I'm feeling which is more emotionally. It made for a good minor conflict.

CSI Files: Did you like playing that?

Giovinazzo: Yeah, fuckin' A! Back in the day, I remember being so excited about that [scene in the] diner where we kind of went off on each other and got a little heated up. Unless they disagree, [scenes like that] aren't going to happen. So somebody's got to disagree with somebody. I was the guy disagreeing with Mac for a long time and then Lindsay and I [were at odds]. So for Flack it's a good way to deal with [Danny] because we are good friends and have this cool relationship. So it's nice to have us disagree on something and find how far you go with that. It's great.

CSI Files: The end of "All in the Family" with Flack telling Danny he has to stop blaming himself and Danny asking, "How? How can I do that?" was so powerful.

Giovinazzo: I think that was a great simple line. How do you get over feeling responsible for someone being hurt? It's not something you can do overnight. So I think [it's a question of] how much they're going to play into that. They do right away, so you're going to get it in these two episode. You're going to see Anna bringing it up in her own way, you're going to see this other character come back in and have a small beat about how I'm dealing with it. So we are doing it actually.

CSI Files: Do you feel like this will be Danny's big arc for the rest of season four?

Giovinazzo: I don't know about that, if they're going to get that deep into it. Right now, they're doing small portions. I don't know if they're going to get into it enough where I can really get into like with the brother storyline [in "Run Silent, Run Deep"] or how they gave an episode to Ruben. I'm not seeing anything to the effect of that depth, a whole episode or even half an episode getting specific with that. They're kind of just poking it in amidst what it is we do every day with the crime and the scene and the issue. So whether they're going to take it to another level next season if it carries on that long [, I don't know]. We're right now finishing up the end of this season, getting at it in this somewhat rushed timeframe. I don't expect it--if they did it, it would be kind of amazing. But it would be kind of amazing.

CSI Files: Speaking of Danny's brother, Louie, has there been any mention of him coming back?

Giovinazzo: No, no mention of Mr. Louie.

CSI Files: Do you ever bring that up with the writers?

Giovinazzo: I haven't in a while. It would be nice, but I don't know if it's been too long now or what or if there's going to be something at some point. I don't see it happening, but you never know.

CSI Files: So you think the writers are kind of past that storyline?

Giovinazzo: I think they'd like to. I just think it's a matter of how they lay out their priorities. I don't think that's a priority in their minds right now, what to do with that story. I could be wrong, but I think it's just not something that [they're looking out now]. That was season two. I think initially they did talk about that, but maybe between season three and then the strike, it's just not something I've heard much about.

CSI Files: Were you happy to be able to draw on Danny's darker, more troubled side with the Ruben storyline?

Giovinazzo: Yeah, when I read that script, I was extremely excited and nervous to get into it. I kind of tend to left field on the show. You're kind of doing the day-to-day and then all of the sudden I have a brother that's near death or I have this kind who I'm responsible for, possibly murdering this new relationship with this girl I never knew on the show. That's the schedule [the writers] are on, they kind of get in [these] things, they'd love to get in more but they get their shots and pop them really hard. And then it's like, how do I hold on to it afterwards because they can't keep making episodes like that. So, yeah, it was just fantastic when I see a script like that. They all follow [Executive Producer] Anthony [Zuiker's] first two episodes ("Tanglewood" and "Run Silent, Run Deep") at least with a certain amount of scenes referring to it and not letting it just be forgotten.

CSI Files: What would you like to see next with Danny?

Giovinazzo: I've seen enough. I don't know specifically. I've been more than lucky with having turns and hills and falls and problems and relationships and disagreements. I don't know. He's always got something going on anyway. Right now it's going to go with how he deals with Ruben and what happens with him and Lindsay and what happens with him and this other girl if that's going to happen. So it's all there. I'd just kind of like to see what they're going to do with that because for me to think of anything else would only be for me to imagine and foresee. I don't really think about it too much. I just wait to see where they're going to go with it.

It's such a piece-by-piece project. You don't have that much time to look ahead. It would be nice to take a beat and look ahead but with this show you have to take it week to week and month to month and handle what it is you need to handle and don't ask questions. And it's fine. I'm very happy with where he's going and where he's gone and where he's came from so fortunately I don't have to think about that. I think it's a lucky thing. I think I got blessed with a really cool character, so I don't have to go, "What's he going to do? Is he going to have something to do? What's he going to become? Who is he?" It's like I think we really established that and they give me the beats you're talking about, what's up with Lindsay, what's up with Rikki, what's up with the kid. I've got my hands full.

CSI Files: Who would you rather see Danny move forward with, Lindsay or Rikki?

Giovinazzo: I don't know. One way, Rikki changes things up and it's a turn, but depending on how far they would go with Lindsay, Lindsay would be a good thing if it would be a part of the show on a weekly sense. It depends on how it was done. I don't really have a particular way I would lean. Whatever the fans want! I think [the writers] have done a nice job of prolonging Danny and Lindsay and torturing the fans, so [they could go with] some sort of change of direction.

CSI Files: Have you enjoyed playing the high drama scenes with Rikki?

Giovinazzo: Yeah, very much. Those scenes are great--they're really challenging. They make you have to perform and make you do something that you have to get to only by focusing to a certain extent if you want to do it to that extent as opposed to a lot of other scenes where you don't have to be in that place. So that's kind of what you want to do. With these shows, I can't play the character like I can in a movie and be that character for fucking three months and lose it, so on these kind of shows when you have scenes really about something important and emotional and you have to crank it out a little, to be upset or to not be upset or to try to not be upset or say things to people that isn't an easy thing to say or communicate, it's great.

CSI Files: The fans have reacted really well to that storyline.

Giovinazzo: That's why they like Danny, because in the beginning he [walked to] the beat of his own drum. I reacted in a way that wasn't just some sort of neutral area. It was either one end or the other or really extreme or emotional. That's why they would like him. You want to watch somebody say, "This is what's going on" and "This is what happened" and "This is what I think" or do you want to see somebody bark it or bite it or cry it. Some people like the crime and the mystery and these visuals and these explosions and these chases and then certain people like two people standing in the hallway getting upset or the young cop defying the older cop or me and Flack disagreeing and saying "No, fuck it, are you out of your mind? No I'm not fucking bringing her to jail. How do you not understand why I'm not going to that?" While at the same time it's a nice situation because it's like, "Look, that's our job. That's what we have to do." So that's fun to watch.

CSI Files: Do you think it was interesting that it was Flack rather than Lindsay who went after Danny in "All in the Family" and really took Danny to task for his actions?

Giovinazzo: I think it was a physical situation, a dangerous situation so I don't know if it would have suited her to be in that situation. I don't know what the reason for that was. I think it makes sense to be Flack because it was emotional yet serious and about this kid that I could have been going after or she could have been going after. He's more of the detective on the street, so [it made sense to] bring him into that arena to deal with it, let alone him being a friend. That's not something Lindsay would find out about as easily if that makes sense.

CSI Files: In "Buzzkill" we once again see Danny trusting the wrong person, a guy claiming to be a victim's boyfriend who turns out not to be. Why do you think Danny has such bad judgment about people?

Giovinazzo: Who else on the show could have that poor judgment? Mac can't have poor judgment. Stella's doing her thing over there. Flack, he's the funny one, but beyond that, he's the guy that's doing his job pretty well, kind of old school and straightforward. So it's like if somebody's got to fuck up, I'm the go-to fuck up. It's the best thing that ever could have happened to me! That's why I think he's that guy, he's the fallible one. He's the one that makes mistakes. Sometimes you think, "How the fuck did he get there? Should he be there/shouldn't he be there?" and then he does things that validate why he's there, but then he does stuff that makes you go, "Well, shit, does he really [deserve] this position?" But I think he always keeps that balance of not going too far either way to not be the individual that he is and at the same time be the cop. He's just always been that guy. I that that was his character description from the beginning. That's why he's that guy. I think that was something I ran with it and playing him a certain way that made him even more apt to be the guy to put in the situation that could be a little sticky.

[In "Buzzkill,"] I don't think he trusts the wrong person. The girl was in the hospital bed--she's dying. There's a suspect on the move that we don't exactly know where [he is]. So the situation of who was responsible was kind of under a certain [bit of time pressure]. Then there's this kid who's claiming to be who is so because of the high [stress] situation, I don't think he was so focused on how would this kid be here. What the [culprits] did was pretty smooth. They were good actors. That shows [how] Danny gets too emotional and gets too into it, so maybe he can [overlook] something like that while at the same time the case at hand was kind of hectic and things were happening. I think it also had to do with a certain kind of writing. They like to payoff [situations] so that's how they're going to set it up. It pays off at the end when I fucking get him. I'm like, "Now we've got you. You pulled it off but now we've got you." There are many different reasons why he ends up trusting the wrong people.

CSI Files: It does make him more interesting than characters who always know what's going on.

Giovinazzo: If I had asked that kid for ID right off the bat or asked him a thousand questions, the episode couldn't have gone on. That set it off into motion. He's the firecracker!

CSI Files: From this point, looking back on all of the episodes, do you have one that stands out as your favorite?

Giovinazzo: I like the first time he showed some emotion, when they found a bunch of people in a diner ("Outside Man"). When he got lost in life and how he felt about it and how people just die and people murder and people are just gone. That was a nice episode. Early on, too--we were all kind of innocent. It was a soft moment with Mac, too, with him coming in and just observing me and letting me be in that place. He was actually okay with me [being] in that kind of place and he kind of got that, that reflection on the real fact of what was going on around us as opposed to being always stoic and always unaffected by it. And obviously in reality this much doesn't really happen in the way it does and they all have their own way of [dealing with it]. I don't know how close real detectives get to [their investigations]. Of course they do, but how they keep it together is something I'll never know. My father tells me things and my sister and brother-in-law. And I don't know how they would actually keep it together seeing all that stuff and being through all that nasty, nasty crap. And I think that's why I like [the end of "Outside Man"]--it's a [revealing] moment. I don't know how often those cats expose themselves and talk about it because that's not what you do because you kind of just have to deal with it. I think that's another thing about Danny--he cries about or he thinks about it or he brings it up where you might not necessarily talk about that stuff.

CSI Files: That is an interesting thing about Danny. He's much more vulnerable than any other character on the show, really. He's much more willing to talk about how he feels.

Giovinazzo: Yeah, yeah. He needs a friend!

CSI Files: Good thing he's got Flack!

Giovinazzo: Right. He's going to soften Flack up a little bit.

CSI Files: Flack always does go out of his way for Danny. Why do you think that is?

Giovinazzo: I think it's what appeals to every single two cops that become partners that actually like each other and get along and I'm sure that there are a lot that don't, but of the ones that do, that becomes their brother in a sense, the person that you know if the shit hits the fan or if you fuck up, you'd better hope that they're going to do the best they can without hurting anybody else or compromising what we're responsible for what we do as cops and be there to help you get down with it. I think any partners that you might talk about, they've been friends for a while. And we're not partners [in the literal sense] but we are partners. The way the show is run, Flack is our partner and he's the guy that deals with all of our shit. We don't have a bunch of detectives coming in, so he's like everyone's partner. That's the way it evolved to be. And I think Lindsay, she doesn't [look out for Danny], because we have that whole other story going on about her and I. And she's also kind of new. And it's not Mac because Mac's the boss and Mac's somebody we have to have a certain dynamic with. So it ends up being [Flack].